..when love mis-called !

Kavya quickly goes through her phonebook, calls up Nisha and waits until she hears the other line pick up.

“Nisha, I don’t know what to do, I really don’t. I love him so much and I don’t think he thinks of me that way. I mean, whenever I see him or think of him, I can’t help it; this smile comes across my face. Sometimes when he notices me smiling, he smiles back. That’s when my knees turn to jello and I get butterflies in my stomach. Nishant is so caring and considerate. Well, actually, I don’t deserve him. He’s too nice for me, I mean, look at all the girls that fall for him. I could never be one of those. They are all so pretty and bubbly and, and … But you know, whenever I think of him or see him, I can’t help it, I smile. He called me the other day about some homework. I made a complete fool of myself. I’m so embarrassed. I stuttered the whole time, but he was so sweet and just kept talking and making me feel better. He’s so perfect Nisha, I don’t deserve him, so why do I keep wishing and praying that he will notice me, why?............Nisha? Nisha are you there… HELLO?”

“This isn’t Nisha.”

Petrified, Kavya asks, “Who is this?”

“This is the guy whose smile turns your knees to jello and everything you just said, is what I’ve been wanting to say since the day I met you ... I am as crazy about you too Kavya; and I am Nishant not your friend Nisha.” :)

For some love is easy and quick – but for Nishant and Kavya this is the beginning of a lifelong relationship, or just the beginning of a flash fire that burnt itself out rather quickly, it was really beautiful with all the colors of love !!

..and the colors of love fade !!

Love came to me last evening and sat down next to me. We remained in silence for hours. Kavya didn’t say anything. I didn’t say anything either. Then, when the sun was about to set, and knowing in advance what she was going to ask me I said: - So, what are you doing here? I thought I told you not to come here anymore.

She said: - I miss you. I miss you deeply! You used to care about me. I’m hungry. You haven’t cared for me lately and I’m love-dead. Why are you doing this to me? I remember you said that I was the most special in your whole life, and that you were going to love me and give me water every day for ever. So? What happened? Seriously, I’m dying. I’m thirsty. I can’t live like this.

I said: - Yes, I know, and I remember what I said, but I can’t feed you anymore. Neither can I give you water, because you’ll be still hungry but you’ll be alive for a long time and it will be more painful for you and for me. And I know about pain, believe me, and ask my broken heart if you don’t!

- But I will die!! ! You promised many things! You are being cruel! - She said.

- I couldn’t be sadder and you know it Love. I am not a man who leaves Love abandoned. I am not a man who doesn’t feed and nurture Love. I would give anything for you Love. But I want you to understand that I just can’t, because if I do, you, Love, will live for ever but I will die of sadness and madness.

She was upset and stood up. In silence, and then looked at me. She was crying, just as I was crying. We were running out of tears.

Kavya was sad. So sad, for her and for me, and she tried to give me hope that 'the one' would come back and then Love could live with us. She tried to convince me that because I thought I had been a good person, and because I loved her so much and cared so much about her, 'the one' would keep me in her heart and she would come back someday. She tried to convince me of many really stupid things, for hours...but !

I knew Love was saying all those things because she was love starved. So I paid little attention to what she was saying. All I said was - No, I won’t love you. No I won’t give you water.

Just before the end, and after we had remained in silence for the last hour, she looked at me and said: -Are you sure you want me to die?

Kavya was the Love of his life, but he had to let her die. Because he needed to be “alive”. That means she had to remain in silence for the rest of her life and understand and Nishant will not do anything to save her. But he warned her of what is going to happen to her and how she is going to die in his thoughts.

But she said: - I’m hungry! Please, please, feed me, at least give me a small glass of water! I’m alive now. So alive... please don’t let me die!

He took his phone out, and moved away to pretend he is on a call, and to make his life simpler, ironically !!!